With the onset of the moment that brings you success, and therefore happiness, you become the owner of emotional freedom. At the same time, there may be weaker people nearby who will be ready to blame you for everything. They use a variety of manipulations, knowing for sure that this is the most successful way to influence you. This is exactly the moment when you will be faced with a choice: give the opportunity to manipulate you or to believe that life changes are your merit. And this is a huge work that allows, by changing your thinking, to reconsider your attitude to your inner Self, to see the world and people in a different way.
Women move forward without stopping even when they achieve certain successes, continuing to develop further. At the same time, the life of loved ones continues to move in the mainstream, established over the years.
Personal change is a journey
On the path of personal change, remember to thank yourself for every step you take. Each of us worries about what is happening in the family. Because more than anything in the world we wish health, happiness, and prosperity to our loved ones, we want them to be happy. But something is holding them back from happy changes. For many years they stay in the same place, and you start to feel guilty. This feeling prevents you from fully experiencing the joy of your own success.
Traveler’s parable
There is a wonderful parable that reveals this problem. It sounds like this. The traveler passed next to a pit filled with manure and saw in it a man who was wallowing in the stench. The traveler ran to the pit, trying to save the man. After all, he was convinced that the unfortunate person needed salvation. Having lost a lot of strength, the rescuer smeared himself with manure. But still pulled the victim out of the fetid captivity to the shore. However, the rescued person instantly returned to the puddle filled with stench. This strangeness surprised a passer-by, and he inquired about the reason why the drowning man jumped into the manure again. The answer discouraged him even more: “I live here!”
The most unpleasant truth lies precisely in the fact that a certain part of people’s lives is like this. When there is an impulse to take them to another, better (in your opinion) level, it looks worthy. But remember that this is completely alien, not your life! You can only offer to help. It’s not in your power to force another person to change their path – this is their life. You just have to remember that you cannot substitute for the functions of God: you have received your life, the responsibility for which lies with you, and you have to deal with it. Happiness is everyone’s own choice. But it is impossible to only think about yourself.
It is very important to find that golden mean – you can be close to the person at the moment when he needs your help, and he will feel your readiness to provide support. Be sure to listen to him, but do not let the complaints turn into ordinary whining.
Respect yourself
Remember to respect yourself and your time. If you feel that there is a normal use of your time, and you turn into a shoulder, in which they constantly sob, without changing anything, then the best choice would be to refuse this role. There is no point in becoming someone’s handkerchief. It’s just that there are people in life who are very comfortable and even profitable to exist in the role of a victim. They position themselves as an unfortunate person deprived of fate.
They will never give you the opportunity to go far. Take a closer look at who is next to you, who of them really strives for change; and who just straddles your favorite topic, and pulls your nerves, and takes time out of you. Such cunning people have been known to the world for a long time. Don’t get involved in someone else’s game, keep the right to your own life.
Learn that whatever happens in your destiny and in the lives of the people around you, is everyone’s own choice. Naturally, at the beginning of life, everyone has different starting opportunities. Some were lucky to be born in a loving full-fledged family; others – in wealthy; some were born with physical disabilities or their parents left them. The diversity of the world proves once again that people are not alike, and everyone has their own choice. If you meet someone who has been disadvantaged since birth, then you will try to stifle your guilt through help. It should be clear to us that if your solution to his problem is intrusive, then you subconsciously strive to be loved. Having success, however, it is very important for you to be pleasing and necessary to such a person.
Happiness is a choice
Our success raises us above those who are less successful financially and mentally. And it is during this period that a feeling based on reality appears. Quite often we are faced with the fact that pity is taken for love. Very few people know how to love. If you are embarrassed for your success next to someone who has not yet achieved similar results, and you are trying to help him, drag him along – the fear of condemnation speaks in you. You start looking for opportunities to maintain a good relationship with yourself. You think this is how you get rid of your guilt. This reaction is natural – yes, you begin to love less.
And you cannot cope with your desire to return to a warm relationship, and this will urge you to make an attempt to help them find happiness. However, such an opportunity can be realized only when a person has a desire to help himself on his own. And it is very important for such a person to know that you are ready to help him. Probably, everyone had to deal with a situation where no one tried to follow the advice you gave. They always find a lot of explanations for the “why”. No wonder. Having once made a choice in favor of the position of the victim, such a person decided that he did not owe anyone or anything. They transfer their resentment to everyone around them, and a feeling of guilt is imposed on people. But this position does not come from a good life.
Lessons come from childhood
Always remember that each of us comes from childhood, each child comes to our world with the expectation of all-consuming love, happiness, and only when the years pass, there will be changes in relation to ourselves, people, and the world as a whole. Have you thought about what will follow after your loved one begins to follow your advice? After all, every action is followed by certain changes, but is he ready for them? If not, then nothing good will come of it, but there will always be a reason to reproach that it was you who pushed him off the intended path, showing your path. You are not given to pave the way to heaven for another person. Your actions will not be beneficial.
And yet, faced with such difficulties, you can influence your loved one. To do this, you yourself have to move along the path of development, and then the person you are trying to help will treat you in a completely different way. You can transform your old relationship. In addition, by your example, you can open the way for transforming his worldview. If you have a desire to give the universe at least one happy destiny, first make an effort and do good to yourself, and the world will become brighter. Remember that you have the right to make changes in your life that you made, improve it – and you will find happiness.
